“Here she is, all mine, trying her best to give me all she can.
How could I ever hurt her? But I didn’t understand then. That I could hurt somebody so badly she would never recover. That a person can, just by living, damage another human being beyond repair.”
― Haruki Murakami, South of the Border, West of the Sun
Here I am, LOLAL-ing. Yes, laughing out loud at life.
When devoid of something, mind seeks exactly that.
When bestowed with the best of things, it grows and feeds insecurities.
Wired with nerves connected to different parts of the body, it controls all sort of emotions.
It builds ego, it doesn’t let go off things.
The perspective of thee is far more superior than others.
From sadness to anger, tears to words, it completely surrenders to emotions.
The emotional balance goes for a jolly ride.
It brings out a face, which is ugly even for self to handle.
Forgiving is almost a far-fetched truth.
Almost juggling between modes like flight or fight.
Mind is a funny thing, controlling every action of the being.
Times like these, it can’t even recount moments of happiness, joyfulness, contentment, giving, selflessness, gratitude or simplicity.
Hereby, accepts that, I am no saint.
But, who says, I can’t learn to become one.
Oh my dear! It’s human to feel this way. It’s perfect to feel uprooted. Time to sow new seeds and grow within.
Lots of love, prayer and good wishes to everyone suffering. Stay strong, for this is the time for your growth.
One weekend, I began to pen down hazy thoughts about life. Sharing with you, what I have perceived through my life experience:
- Love: It is important to love, because, it helps us appreciate life fully. Loving someone is deliberate, conscious and it means, you choose to appreciate all of them, for who they are.
- Integrity: Actions speak louder than what you say. Practice what you preach. And, be who you are and share what you believe in.
- Justice: Equality is what we all thrive for. Respect people genuinely. For, you don’t know what their story is all about.
- Acceptance: Stems from being just and fair. But, accepting goes an extra mile. You now have an ability to understand this other person’s story, their perspectives, their ideas, their opinions, basically, all the things that make them and accept them for who they are.
- Patience: They say, good things come to those who wait. But, I believe that your attitude and how you act matters the most, while waiting. The current situation might be extremely fragile. But, let it pass, stay calm.
- Habits: One of the most important habits that’s helped me is to count my blessings. Every single day, I am grateful for the kind of family, friends, love of all the good people, the life I have been blessed with. I’d also say, waking up early, investing in yourself (exercise), the kind of food you eat are baby steps towards building some decent habits.
- Courage: Follow your heart, its easier said than done. But, nothing can gratify self more than pursuing what we want. It feels like a huge step ahead, but it’s worth giving it a try!
- Failures: Embrace them! Because, failures teach you lessons worth a lifetime.
- Lead: Dislike something? Be the change maker. Influence. Take the lead.
- Follow: Love someone else’s initiative? Relate to it? Shun your ego. Collaborate with them, join the team and make a difference.
- Values: At the end, your values make the person you are. Your ideals, your believe system is important. Never ever undermine them. For, that defines you as an individual.
- Truth: Being true is one thing, but being true to oneself is another thing. The latter helps you to evolve.
- Learn: There is so much to learn everyday, from everyone around you. You absorb, what you seek.
- Teach: Because, teaching is one metric that will make you realize how much you really know.
- Forgive: Life’s too short to deal with conflicts. Weeks, months or years later, you are only going to laugh at things you were angry for. Like Thumper says: “If you can’t say something nice.. don’t say nothing at all.“
- Nothingness: At times, it’s an asset to do nothing at all. Take moments to pause and reflect. It helps you gain some clarity and reinvent yourself.
- Selfless: It’s the most powerful thing to do. To be at the giving end always.
25 years of bond. And, one of my favorite chapters just ended.
But, the memories will live on.
I will cook triangle, rhombus dosas,
solve sudoku puzzles,
listen to instrumental music,
fix plumbing, electrical related work at home,
handwrite letters and
maybe have the will power just like you.
Mani Thatha (09.08.1942 – 03.07.2015)
The kind of love that you don’t realise exists until you experience it.
The kind of love which is honest. real. genuine. hard to find.
The kind of love that just happens without any expectation.
The kind of love where everything is unconditional.
The kind of love that makes you comfortable.
The kind of love which brings a smile.
The kind of love where you are yourself. and completely transparent.
The kind of love you can get used to every single day.
The kind of love you dream of seeing only in books, music, art, movies.
The kind of love that existed in yesteryears you think.
The kind of love which isn’t easy. But not difficult either.
The kind of love where two people never want to give up on each other.
The kind of love you wanted, deserved.
The kind of love is you.
Inspiration : 100 days of love movie
A city that accepted me whole heartedly for what I was. Made me part of it. Allowed me to experience some great moments. This is the city where I fell in love all over again. With myself. With Mumbai.
On October 15th 2013, I got down from an early morning flight at around 7:12 am and entered Mumbai Airport. With thoughts and dreams that always overwhelmed me about the city I aspired to be part of. All by myself, I moved to Mumbai leaving behind a city that churned the person I am today – Chennai. The most important people in my life – amma, appa, grandparents, friends, teachers, gurus, home, my comfort zone was all left behind. I got a cab and addressed the cab driver as sir. Straight ahead, he dropped me at ‘Raj Legacy’ in Vikhroli. I bucked up and got ready for my first day at work after settling into the guest house.
Work routine happened. The next 4 weeks, I got into preparing for a certificate exam. Amidst that, I found a house in Vikhroli, about 600 meters away from my work place. That’s a dream life for any Mumbaikar. No travel. Not much distance. Prime location on the main road. Decent locality. And a house was found. It was that time of the year that I started experiencing real life. In those 4-5 weeks (until November 6th 2013), I explored different parts of Mumbai and these experiences mean a lot to me.
Some of them include –
- Chembur Fine Arts, Chembur
- IIT, Powai
- Shanmukhananda Sabha, Sion
- Crawford Market, Victoria Terminus / CST
- Badshah’s Falooda, Victoria Terminus / CST
- Sidharth’s place, Powai
- Radhakrishnan uncle’s place, Wadala
- RCity Mall, Ghatkopar
- Phoneix Mall, Kurla
- Marine Drive
- Prithvi Theatre, Juhu
- Pop Tates, Vikhroli
- Bandra Worli Sea-Link
- Bandra Market
- Walk around Dadar
- Out of Blue, Powai
- Siddhi Vinayak Temple, Prabhadevi
- Powai Lake
And, one day, the city I aspired to live in abruptly came to an end due to decisions of shifting to charming Pondicherry 🙂
On Dec 20th 2013, at around 7:12 pm I was back in Mumbai Airport. And this time, I wasn’t alone. I was filled with memories worth a lifetime.
Mumbai. Thanks for taking me into your arms. And, allowing me to leave away with fond memories.
Until we meet soon, be the awesome place you’re 🙂
Its been a while since I felt this way. Felt what my internal emotions are like. The last 25-30 days has redefined me as a human being and I am continuing to learn through this phase.
The last time, I felt such a transition in me was during my tenure at Pune. Probably because I was suddenly moving along with people from vast culture and each of them had their own valuable opinion. This is similar now because I am with an organization which itself has a unique culture and every employee/colleague here are way too special.
I am mostly through high tide of emotions while with them. I have had people tell me great things that I wasn’t confident about myself. I have had constructive feedback on how I can become better. I am learning to get better because of their motivation – also because human mind aspires to make progress.